Ok, so today didn't turn out the way I was hoping....I have to accept somehow that my baby girl is not a baby anymore...she's a teenager and she has her own circle of friends...and that I can't have her around me all the time... my oh my....since I can't stand being around my husband, I'm not sure what I really want??? I wish I could work 24 hours a day, maybe just come home to check on them....clean up & change..then go back to work....

5/22/10



Dear www.com,



Today was a very disappointing day....not that it's not everyday! wish my husband wouldn't say or do things to keep my hopes up only to crush it ! I know I'm supposed to be used to it by now,after all, we've been married for over 15 long years!!! but it's getting harder and harder everyday, and especially when it involves my daughter. But then, maybe it's our age difference?

I wish someone had told me how crazy I was to marry someone 34 years older then! I was just 24 & he was 58 when he married me for petes sake!!! why didn't anyone talk to him! and how sickening it was to marry someone who was younger than his youngest child for heaven's sake!(yes, he was divorced, & I wonder why?)and from another country, met through a penpal program, why? oh, yeah, I forgot, it was supposed to be marriage of convenience, just so I can get out of my poor struggling childhood, he promised I'd have a better life here with him, of course I jumped on it!!! I didn't care! I thought I had a plan. Looks like it all blew right in my face! Karma please go away!!!!!!